Wrangling Fear

“The only thing we have to fear is fear itself.”
---Franklin D. Roosevelt (March 4, 1933)


​I grew up in a blue-collar town and my dad was a vile and abusive man. He abused both my mother and me, and she turned to alcohol as a coping mechanism. Fear and uncertainty were staples during my formative years because life at home was a nightmare.

One of my greatest fears happened to be financial insecurity. I never knew where my next meal was coming from; and I imagined I might end up homeless. I’ll share about that in this article.
 
WRANGLING MY OWN FEARS
My dad’s job required him to travel three weeks out of every month for eight months of the year. Every time he took to the road my mom would pick up a liquor bottle as soon as he was out the door. Many a day, she would pass out drunk sometime during the afternoon, which left me to fend for myself. Consequently, I spent a lot of time on the streets as a youngster; and I devised schemes to keep my pockets full so I wouldn’t go hungry.
 
I was blessed with an above average intellect, and I viewed my education as a way out of my awful situation. As a result, I buckled down in school. I also competed athletically to improve my chances at earning a scholarship. Through the grace of God, scouts took notice and I made my way into Princeton. Once there, I thought I’d never look back.
 
After graduation, I made a decent living. I built a nest egg and planned for my retirement. That said, the feelings of fear and uncertainty relating to money followed me for years. They clouded my vision and impaired my judgment. So much so, that I was oblivious to very real dangers my business interests had surfaced.
 
I ran afoul of some very wealthy and powerful men, and they contracted killers to terminate my existence. In June of 2013, I was attacked by two men on an elevated bus platform at Denver International Airport while traveling on an assignment. They threw me off the four-story platform, and it nearly cost me my life.
 
The attack put me into a coma, and I spent over five months in the hospital. My insurance eventually ran out and the bills started to come due. Before the accident, I had begun a new business venture and my savings were already stretched. I was unable to work, and I had little money coming in.
 
After I was discharged from the hospital, I had a year and a half of physical rehabilitation ahead of me. At one point during that period, I thought my situation was hopeless. Things became so bad that I imagined I’d never be able to work again and might even wind up living on the streets. Many a night, I cried myself to sleep and called out to God in despair.
 
In that period of darkness, Jesus took the reins. My expenses were miraculously covered; and shortly afterward he opened the door to a couple of new consulting engagements.
 
Our firm was reborn, and my career headed in a completely new direction. In addition to branding, business analytics and strategic planning engagements, we started assisting entrepreneurs in their efforts to secure venture capital. This has become our core practice area in recent years, and we find these assignments to be our most fulfilling engagements.
 
As odd as this may seem, the attempt on my life happens to be the greatest blessing of my life. My reliance on Our lord and savior has grown by leaps and bounds since that day. I’ve been set free of the fears of becoming homeless and going hungry; and I have a much truer sense of purpose.
 
The adversity I’ve faced has now become somewhat of an asset much like Proverbs 17:17 describes. I now realize that all I am afforded has been conferred upon me through God’s grace, and I’ve earned a degree of humility. For Christ alone grants us pardon so we may carry out His will.
 
Meditation and prayer have become staples in my life in the years since the attack. I turn my care and will over to Our lord and savior Jesus Christ every morning and ask for his guidance and direction as I plan out the day ahead.
 
During these quiet times together, the Holy Spirit has revealed much to me about myself. I’ve channeled back to lessons in life that I had shelved in the back of my mind; and I have recalled the tutelage of mentors and instructors who honed my skills and helped forge my character.
 
One of the greatest lessons I have recalled is that you can train yourself to recognize fear. Both within yourself and within others. When you're under fear, your survival instincts begin to kick in, and your body gives off telltale signs when they do.

That said, there are two distinctly different types of fear. Some fears are sheep, and others happen to be wolves. The keys are first knowing which you’re dealing with, and then roping those fears into submission.

​When I start to feel fear, my mind begins to race; and my pulse begins to quicken if I don’t nip the racing thoughts in the bud. Before I know it, I’m fidgeting in my seat and the world around me becomes cloudy. At that point, fear has the advantage. And like wagon train settlers on the American frontier, I become easy prey for outlaws, marauders and desperados whenever that happens.

When fear takes hold of me, I must remind myself that I've been afforded a sheriff's badge, and that’s it’s my duty to confront the perpetrator. That means tapping into the fear and shining light upon the source with the truth.

​This isn’t as easy as it sounds because fear happens to be a shape shifter. It takes many forms, and most of them are slippery suckers.

​Sometimes my fears appear as a strongman outlaw with the gift of gab. If I happen to be hungry, angry, lonely or tired when the strongman disturbs my peace, I’m in for a fight. If I manage to wrestle it down, it starts to plea bargain with me. It reminds me that it’s a long ride back to the jail and offers me a bribe to dismiss the criminal offense.
 
If I take that bribe, I’m in for a world of hurt. Because that strongman outlaw usually doesn’t travel alone. It’s generally tied in with a gang of marauding fears hiding all along the trail. The strongman has a horse that’s lot faster than mine, and it knows where its compadres are positioned. Before I know it, they’ve got me encircled; and they begin to pick me apart in short order.
 
They go after my scars. Wounds from the past that haven’t quite healed. They’re armed with sharp tongues and they’re deadly accurate with their aim. If my anger flairs, they smack me upside my head with resentments and leave me to rot on the trail. A tasty morsel for roving desperados that often follow in their wake.
 
When that strongman starts to offer the bribe, I’m learning to simply go about my business. I do my best to keep my mouth shut and not say a word. Instead, I hog-tie the strongman with my rope, blindfold it, stuff a bandana in its mouth, and drag it straight back to the jail behind my horse.
 
It isn’t my job to dispense justice. Rather, it’s my duty to keep the peace. I say a prayer for the outlaw and hand him over to Christ for redemption. I try not to look back once I have. Instead, I return the trail and go about my business. I know the verdict will be swift and that’s sufficient. The truth always prevails. Light always vanquishes the darkness.

CONFRONT YOUR FEARS EARLY ON
Confronting fear is an imperative, especially for entrepreneurs. Business is oftentimes warfare, and it’s necessary to keep a clear head in order to remain true to your mission. If you avoid your persistent fears, they tend to surface at the least opportune times. Our unholy enemy senses fear and uses it to his advantage.
 
You jeopardize everything you’ve worked for unless you rope your own fears and hand them over to God. For example, employees can sense doubt and uncertainty. It often breeds worry and concern. When patterns of the two begin to emerge, your top performers are likely to jump ship. Oftentimes, to your competitors.
 
Similarly, investors can sense desperation. Most won’t touch you when you smell of it. You’re simply a bad gamble and the risks to their portfolio are too great. And those who will entertain your ideas when you smell of desperation are oftentimes wolves. Some will listen to your pitch just to pick your brain. They’ll steal your ideas in order to sell them off, or even start a business of their own that mirrors yours.
 
Other wolves will intentionally wrangle you into a deal that becomes a no-win situation for you. They’ll deliberately structure the terms of the contract so that it’s nearly impossible to diversify or retool. Perhaps worse, they may plot to dilute your holdings over time; to a point where you have no say in the company.
 
Last but certainly not least: you’re likely to make unwise decisions if you’re not cognizant of your own fears. The Enemy is cunning, baffling and powerful. Before you know it, you’re responding to his minions rather than the voice of reason. If that happens, there's a good chance you'll wind up getting cocky, going bent, turning flaccid or becoming greedy. You may even compromise your company’s mission without even realizing it.

ENTREPRENEURS: FOR YOUR JOURNEY AHEAD

I waited patiently for the LORD;
he inclined to me and heard my cry.
He drew me up from the pit of destruction,
out of the miry bog,
and set my feet upon a rock,
making my steps secure.
He put a new song in my mouth,
a song of praise to our God.
Many will see and fear,
and put their trust in the LORD.
---Psalms 40:1-3​

May you find clarity of vision and purity of thought as you move toward your purpose. Confront your fears, rope them down, and turn them over to Jesus Christ. Like the mustard seed, your vision will take root.
 
 
​Author: Erik Gagnon - Managing Partner, Chi Rho Consulting